I'm closer than I used to be, but not "there."
I'm not okay with that, but I'm not sad about it, either.
There are some things that I'd been saving that hold great memories for me.
A tanktop that I've had since middle school that I wanted to hold on to because it reminded me to time spent with friends of the family whom we don't and cannot see any more.
Another tanktop from the trip I took after high school graduation to visit my Grandmother in Missouri. It was a huge trip, involving many firsts (flying on a plane, going to see my Grandmother in the first place, seeing family that I wasn't aware of before then, etc).
A piece of dress-up from when I was probably 5 or 6, that I've been holding on to because it reminds me of family that has passed and time spent with them.
And all those things got put in the to-go bag finally.
I can remember those family friends that we don't see any more, and while one of those friends has passed, I am not going to forget about them (plus, I have another item that reminds me of them anyway).
I can remember the trip to see my Grandmother with no issue - I have emails leading up to the trip, I have photos from the trip and of all of the family that I met on the trip.
And I have photos of those times from when I was little, as well as photos of those family members. Not many, but that's okay.
It feels bad to be letting go of these things that, within seeing them or even remembering of their existence, remind me of people and times gone. Because if I don't have those things, I won't be able to remember such things so easily, right?
In reality, those items were stored in a bag in the closet. They weren't in a place to see often, but only when diving into the depths of my closet! That wasn't doing me any favors to be able to remember any of it!
So what's the point in keeping the items, anyway?
I'm not sure. But I am sure that there are better ways to not lose memories.
At the same time, there are still things I'm not able to get rid of yet.
Things from when I was really small, items from rather expensive hobbies that I don't want to get rid of, in case I decide to go back to them, and old cell phones (which, actually, have come in handy more than once - more on that soon!) - and that's just a portion.
It's a process. And I'm trying to dwell on it.
Because dwelling on it, forcing myself to think about it all, is going to be the only way to work through it.
Things hidden away in the closet are easy to forget about. If I'm forcing myself to get in the closet more, look through things more, process things more, it'll be easier to find the moment where I'm able to say "okay, it can go."
In the meantime, I'll be trying to find more things to go - big or small, sentimental or not, and keep at it. It's the only way I know how.
How do you deal with emotional items that are no longer serving a purpose?
~Havok
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I agree, it's such a process! It sounds like you're on a good track though, baby steps is what I say. There are certain things I will never part with simply because they hold such a place for me emotionally. The outfits I brought my daughters home in, for example. Other things, like the outfit I wore when I started my first "real job" can go. Why am I holding on? Thanks for the inspiration my friend! We are in it together!
ReplyDeleteBaby steps, indeed! :) There are some things that are worth holding on to (like the outfits for your daughters - that's the perfect thing to hold on to!) but things that aren't nearly as precious...while it may take some time to be able to say good-bye to them, working towards that is important. I have plenty of other things that will be going, once I can get up the nerve to do so, but it's great to know that I have started (and that I've recorded some of the memories that went along with them!).
DeleteThank you so much for stopping by! :D
It is a process and you are doing great! Thanks for sharing and inspiring.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much! It really is a process - a long one, at that, but I would much rather work on it bit by bit and really be able to make those decisions than trying to get it done in one swoop and doing a poor job of it!
DeleteThank you very much for stopping by! :)
You're doing great! It helps to know we are all in it, you keep me going! Thank you :)
ReplyDeleteThank you so much! Glad I can help you along in the process as well! It gets easier, let me tell you! I just dropped off two bags at Goodwill today and I feel so much better about it! :D
DeleteAnd thank you so much for stopping by! :D